Maimonides has an extremely promising program. It is young, but has lots of potential.
Pre-interview get together: We met at Union Hall in Brooklyn from 6-9pm. Very cute bar with Bacce ball as the main attraction. I was about the 7th person who got there, arriving late 6:15 since I had a really hard time finding parking. At the beginning, there was only 1 resident and 7 medstudents. A hodgepodge of candidates from Dominica, Mexico, and the US. Although the invite distinctly said "pre-interview gathering," my mind was excited about eating. Although we didn't have dinner, we did have some outstanding corn dogs. Tons of residents showed up later. The residents were nice. They have quite a diverse program, with cali kids, Ivy leaguers, surgery switchers, and FMGs alike. One of the somewhat strange interactions I had was with a resident from LA who couldn't stop talking about all the reasons why he hated LA. A nice guy, but I don't understand why one would tell me how much he hates LA, knowing I go to the University of California, Los Angeles. It's like me writing about how much I hate people who read blogs.
Interview day:
No need to read too much about Maimonides before interview day. The Program Director, Jonathan Rose, give you almost all that you need to know about the program before you start. He was pretty funny with some borderline jokes, which made me chuckle. One comment being that he was half Asian (he's clearly not Asian), because his wife is Asian. He said that half of the room was from Asia (well, half of the room was Asian-America). And his yellow-fever comment was classic. He said his residents were more and more attractive and I kid you not, he said "A more attractive resident makes patients more comfortable." Hilarious.
The down and dirty about the program:
Dr. Rose kept saying "You are not needed, you are wanted." He emphasized that 40% of the patients are seen by attendings only. If a resident gets sick, an attending covers. That is a much different attitude than other programs where they even count medical students as needed hands.
Patients are truly diverse. It's the first place so far that I've seen Chinese and Russian translators on staff. Patients are sick. 40% admission rate- like North Shore.
Trauma- They do a couple of months at Shock Trauma in Maryland, like North Shore.
Pediatrics- outstanding. They had so many interesting kids, just having toured the place. They serve an area of 2.5 million residents and are the only peds center in the area. So sick kids.
One of the best parts is how much they emphasized operational efficiency. I think they have a good system, or at least I was sold by the sales pitch. At a gland, their computer system rivals UCLAs (which I love). No papers! They have these people called expediters, who are there to do just that -- expedite stuff: calling ultrasound, finding stuff, whatever... It's a good concept.
Ultrasound- They have great ultrasounds and all the residents are ultrasounds certified by the end of residency.
I actually really like the fact that they do evals for the residents and attendings. I think it keeps people on their toes.
They have such young, energetic faculty who really seem to love the program. They sold me on the fact that they were more open to creative ideas and would work with the residents.
After the talk by Dr. Rose, we had a brief talk by Dr. Davidson who came across as one of the most sincere chairmen with whom I have interacted. He sincerely thanked us for choosing EM. You'll hear it if you interview there, but WEAR YOUR NAME TAG ON THE RIGHT COLLAR! You'll feel bad after the talk if your name tag is anywhere else. His talk was such a good reminder to me about patient care and our position as doctors taking care of scared patients.
the marathon of interviews. We all had four 15-30 minute interviews. My first one was with Dr. John Marshall. Super nice, former program director, current Vice Chairman and Medical Director. We basically just talked about operations and my MBA. He loves to talk. After the interview, we talked a lot about Macs, iphones, and some software junkie stuff.
Second interview was with Dr. Rose the PD. Also awesome. I got the impression that he bends over backwards for this residents and really works with them to get the elective that they want, so long as they are reasonable. Also loves to talk.
Third interview with Dr. Klein, Associate PD. She was quite opinionated, which I loved. Told me how things really were, unedited, uncensored. She did a lot of disaster relief work so we talked about Katrina and her experiences.
Last interview was with Dr. Motov. Very nice, but serious. I couldn't tell whether it was an act, or he was really that serious, but I stayed peppy the entire interview. He was the most intimidating interviewer that I've had so far, but it was nice to be challenged- and he did. He asked the standard interview questions and pushed me on them. Strengths, weaknesses, why do I want to go there, why EM, why Maimonides, what can I bring to patient care, would I challenge an attending.... Very direct questions, not conversational, but I really liked this style of interview. He's a former surgeon, so be aware, he wants direct answers. Don't straddle or give soft answers.
Lunch was good - talked with some more residents. Then the tour of the impressively large ED with no waiting patients. Impressive.
Overall - fantastic program with lots of potential, great operations, mentors, sick and diverse patients.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Talking crap at on the Emergency Medicine Interview Trail
I met a guy named Scott (I'll keep his last name private) last week at the North Shore Emergency Medicine Interview. He told me that he had just finished a sub-internship at Harbor-UCLA Emergency Medicine department. I told him "I loved that program." Of course- It's my home institution. I have friends there, they see very sick patients, county hospital, etc. His immediate response after I said "I love it" was "I hated it... so inefficient.... so many Spanish-only speaking patients... too busy... I'm not going to rank it."
I was SO offended, like he was insulting my poor mother or something. There are improvements that can be made at every ED in the US, but don't go around insulting programs. Geez. I wanted to call up my friends at Harbor to tell them about this guy, I was so appalled.
Don't do that. You'll end up in someone's blog.
I was SO offended, like he was insulting my poor mother or something. There are improvements that can be made at every ED in the US, but don't go around insulting programs. Geez. I wanted to call up my friends at Harbor to tell them about this guy, I was so appalled.
Don't do that. You'll end up in someone's blog.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
North Shore Emergency Department
Impressive interview day and interview night.
The night before the interview, we went to La Paella, this very cute tapas place between 2nd and 3rd ave in Manhattan. The residents really seemed to like each other and there was a very big crew that came out. There were probably 8 interviewees and 15 residents + a couple of nice partners. Dinner was tasty and the residents stayed out. I actually left since I was tired and had a drive home but they went to another bar -- a good sign that they get along well.
We started off with a tour and a talk, which was short and sweet. Their ER is relatively big and they make it a point to not have anyone waiting. It was slow when we went on the tour. It seemed like the majority of the patient population was relatively well off and they were really sick. They had failed treatment by their PCPs and specialists, so when they got to the ER, they were ready to admitted. What they told me was about 40% of patients get admitted.
Unlike many other hospitals, they are cash flow positive and so they have good ancillary staff. The doctors are playing doctors - meaning they are not wheeling around their patients and they are not having to draw blood.
The residents make more than most programs in the US, starting off at $59,000ish. Plus they have nice subsidized housing, which ends up being around $500 for a studio and $1000 for a 2 bedroom with free parking and being able to roll out of bed and go to work. All nice bonuses.
I was fully engaged by the talk by the program director. He talked next for about an hour about his ideals and where he sees the program. They have an administrative block and many other electives that I found unique. Their simulation center is outstanding. The procedures are R1 focused with the R1s doing approximately 100 intubations by their first year. This is unheard of. They prepare residents well to go work in the community after they leave this 3 year program. If you want to do a fellowship, they offer the gamut. Sports med, critical care, ultrasound, international med, toxicology...
They spend a month in Maryland to get exposure to trauma, but they are put up in a nice hotel and the residents seemed to like it. They are on an 8 year accreditation cycle and have admitting privileges.
Tuesday nights are protected nights and all residents get to go home so they can make it to conference in the morning. That was a nice policy to make. Wednesday conferences.
One of the parts of the program that was only mentioned during the pre-interview dinner was that they take quizzes. This was different than other programs. This could be a good or a bad thing. This emphasizes that people need to read, but tough taking quizzes during residency. It's one of those "eat your spinach, it's good for you" things. One of the residents asked me what type of patients I wanted to work with and I said "all types" and he asked whether I wanted to work with the underserved. When I said "yes," his reaction made me feel like there weren't many underserved patients at this hospital.
Lunch was good. Pasta, pizza, salads, sodas.
The interviews were benign. One was with the program director. One was with another EM faculty member. The last one was a 5 panel interview with the students. They asked me about Kilimanjaro. No hard questions, all really wanted to get to know me.
After the last interview, I went home.
Overall, very impressive program. Happy residents. Good training to work at a nice hospital.
The night before the interview, we went to La Paella, this very cute tapas place between 2nd and 3rd ave in Manhattan. The residents really seemed to like each other and there was a very big crew that came out. There were probably 8 interviewees and 15 residents + a couple of nice partners. Dinner was tasty and the residents stayed out. I actually left since I was tired and had a drive home but they went to another bar -- a good sign that they get along well.
We started off with a tour and a talk, which was short and sweet. Their ER is relatively big and they make it a point to not have anyone waiting. It was slow when we went on the tour. It seemed like the majority of the patient population was relatively well off and they were really sick. They had failed treatment by their PCPs and specialists, so when they got to the ER, they were ready to admitted. What they told me was about 40% of patients get admitted.
Unlike many other hospitals, they are cash flow positive and so they have good ancillary staff. The doctors are playing doctors - meaning they are not wheeling around their patients and they are not having to draw blood.
The residents make more than most programs in the US, starting off at $59,000ish. Plus they have nice subsidized housing, which ends up being around $500 for a studio and $1000 for a 2 bedroom with free parking and being able to roll out of bed and go to work. All nice bonuses.
I was fully engaged by the talk by the program director. He talked next for about an hour about his ideals and where he sees the program. They have an administrative block and many other electives that I found unique. Their simulation center is outstanding. The procedures are R1 focused with the R1s doing approximately 100 intubations by their first year. This is unheard of. They prepare residents well to go work in the community after they leave this 3 year program. If you want to do a fellowship, they offer the gamut. Sports med, critical care, ultrasound, international med, toxicology...
They spend a month in Maryland to get exposure to trauma, but they are put up in a nice hotel and the residents seemed to like it. They are on an 8 year accreditation cycle and have admitting privileges.
Tuesday nights are protected nights and all residents get to go home so they can make it to conference in the morning. That was a nice policy to make. Wednesday conferences.
One of the parts of the program that was only mentioned during the pre-interview dinner was that they take quizzes. This was different than other programs. This could be a good or a bad thing. This emphasizes that people need to read, but tough taking quizzes during residency. It's one of those "eat your spinach, it's good for you" things. One of the residents asked me what type of patients I wanted to work with and I said "all types" and he asked whether I wanted to work with the underserved. When I said "yes," his reaction made me feel like there weren't many underserved patients at this hospital.
Lunch was good. Pasta, pizza, salads, sodas.
The interviews were benign. One was with the program director. One was with another EM faculty member. The last one was a 5 panel interview with the students. They asked me about Kilimanjaro. No hard questions, all really wanted to get to know me.
After the last interview, I went home.
Overall, very impressive program. Happy residents. Good training to work at a nice hospital.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Interview season
It's the beginning of interview season and I wanted to record some of my experiences for future reference. I looked at a lot of sites for interview advice and thoughts but couldn't find many. These are my thoughts in going through the 2009-2010 Emergency Medicine match process.
The ERAS process was not as painful as I thought it'd be. I applied to 20 schools. Prior to submitting my application, I was told that I might not meet the USMLE cut off for a few schools. I found that to be incorrect. I was told that UCDavis had a cut off -- incorrect. I was also told that UC Irvine had a cut off -- possibly correct. How do I know? UCI is the only school in California who has not offered me an interview yet. Obviously, there could be a number of reasons why I did not get an interview at UCI, but since I was told they have a USMLE cut off, that's what I'll blame it on.
I got letters of recommendation from 4 people. I went against many people's advice and I got one letter from Emergency Medicine, and 3 from non emergency medicine (1 surgery, 1 internal medicine, 1 business).
I was surprised that they interview people in October -- before letters, before dean's letter, before transcripts, before a lot. So, it looks like many programs are interviewing based on board scores, personal statement, and resume.
The rest of the posts will be my experiences interviewing.
The ERAS process was not as painful as I thought it'd be. I applied to 20 schools. Prior to submitting my application, I was told that I might not meet the USMLE cut off for a few schools. I found that to be incorrect. I was told that UCDavis had a cut off -- incorrect. I was also told that UC Irvine had a cut off -- possibly correct. How do I know? UCI is the only school in California who has not offered me an interview yet. Obviously, there could be a number of reasons why I did not get an interview at UCI, but since I was told they have a USMLE cut off, that's what I'll blame it on.
I got letters of recommendation from 4 people. I went against many people's advice and I got one letter from Emergency Medicine, and 3 from non emergency medicine (1 surgery, 1 internal medicine, 1 business).
I was surprised that they interview people in October -- before letters, before dean's letter, before transcripts, before a lot. So, it looks like many programs are interviewing based on board scores, personal statement, and resume.
The rest of the posts will be my experiences interviewing.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Jumping
I just re-read my blog from March 2008 about falling in love. Love used to be this ambiguous concept before meeting Vince. As trite as it may sound, now, I know what being in true love can mean. We knew after our first weekend together and never looked back. By our second weekend, he told me he wanted to marry me.
He said to me, the only regret he will have about growing old with me, is not growing up with me. By our second weekend together, he told me he'd never leave me. I thought he was lying.
On the 5th day after we began our lives together, he wrote this:
He said to me, the only regret he will have about growing old with me, is not growing up with me. By our second weekend together, he told me he'd never leave me. I thought he was lying.
On the 5th day after we began our lives together, he wrote this:
"Tina, I'm so surprised by you. I can't lie and I can't hide how fascinated I am by someone so smart and so complex and so gorgeous - but I'd get over that in a week if I needed to. And so just when I thought you couldn't get any better, you show me that you're also so REAL - a beautiful person with real feelings. And now I'm seriously screwed.
So tina, you can trust me, just jump. Can't promise that you won't get hurt, but I'll jump with you.
In my world, you're today's Person of the Day... for the 5th day straight."
We jumped. We really jumped.
Two weeks later, he writes:
"I can't stop thinking about us getting married. Seriously - waiting for you at the altar, seeing your big smile. This is not the same Vince just 3 weeks ago. It's like "I'm in love with the world, through the eyes of a girl, whose still around the morning after." I love how you've changed me and I so look forward to all the things I'll get to learn from you.
Will we always be this in love... I think so."
I didn't think it was possible to be more in love than we were when we first met. We are.
We jumped. We really jumped.
Two weeks later, he writes:
"I can't stop thinking about us getting married. Seriously - waiting for you at the altar, seeing your big smile. This is not the same Vince just 3 weeks ago. It's like "I'm in love with the world, through the eyes of a girl, whose still around the morning after." I love how you've changed me and I so look forward to all the things I'll get to learn from you.
Will we always be this in love... I think so."
I didn't think it was possible to be more in love than we were when we first met. We are.Saturday, September 12, 2009
Moved
"Am I going to be okay?," this 16 year old said to the paramedic.
"The doctors here are going to take good care of you... the best care of you possible. I gave your mom my cell phone number. I want her to call me when you get outta here."
The room filled with emotions - afraid for an unborn child, fear for a son, tears for the patient and his family.
I wanted to cry. For the first time since I got back into medical school, I wanted to cry.
He was kid playing football. Tonight he played the last game of his life. A poorly executed tackle left him permanently paralyzed from the neck down in one terrible moment. His spine was fractured, shattered, destroyed by one tackle. He will never walk again. He'll never hug. He'll never be able to hold someone's hand.
Heartbreaking. So heartbreaking.
"The doctors here are going to take good care of you... the best care of you possible. I gave your mom my cell phone number. I want her to call me when you get outta here."
The room filled with emotions - afraid for an unborn child, fear for a son, tears for the patient and his family.
I wanted to cry. For the first time since I got back into medical school, I wanted to cry.
He was kid playing football. Tonight he played the last game of his life. A poorly executed tackle left him permanently paralyzed from the neck down in one terrible moment. His spine was fractured, shattered, destroyed by one tackle. He will never walk again. He'll never hug. He'll never be able to hold someone's hand.
Heartbreaking. So heartbreaking.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
I was in LA last weekend and found an interesting slice of graffiti. Instead of spraying gang signs or slogans, I found this sprayed on Main Street.
My biggest fear is that people associate Sarah Palin's lack of qualifications with her gender. She's under-qualified, not because she's a she, but because she's under-qualified.
Kindergarten and Harvard Business School
If you can't dream big, how are you ever going to accomplish anything?
When I was in kindergarten, I thought I could do anything. I thought I could be a painter, a firefighter, and astronaut. In high school, our focus became limited. They told us that we had to get into college first, to put our dreams on hold to focus on the path. In college, the vision became even narrower. I couldn't be a global health leader until I became a doctor and could be a doctor until I got into medical school, and couldn't get into medical school until I took the MCATs and couldn't take the MCATs until I took my premed requirements... and the list goes on and on. So much of my mental energy was spent on proving to others that I COULD do it.
A strange reversal occurred when I came to business school. Suddenly, everyone again had such lofty, idealistic goals. I have a friend who wants to be president of the US. Another wants to be president of Bolivia. One wants to own the most successful company in the world. Many want to be the best parent on earth. We can do anything. Harvard Business School, like kindergarten, fosters an environment where I should not just dream big, I should truly believe realistically that can become Director of the World Health Organization, if I wanted to be.
What happened between age 5 and 25 where our teachers and friends thought that encouragement is overrated?
I spoke to an premed student today who wants to start a non-profit organization, akin to Doctors Without Borders. People told her that she was being unrealistic. It made me incredibly sad. There's nothing in her life or in her career path that is preventing her from accomplishing that mission. Why discourage her? It's so easy to thwart other people's hopes and dreams. I bet a lot of people told Paul Farmer that he couldn't improve health care in Haiti. If Barack listened to everyone who said "America isn't ready for a black president," he would be here today. I wonder how many people told Sandra Day O'Connor that it's unlikely that she'd be the first female Supreme Court Justice.
It's a sad testament to our peer groups. We were reminded in class last week that we should surround ourselves by people who will make us better. I hope this premed girl who I spoke to on the phone ignores the words of discouragement from others, and ends up with the most effective non-profit in the world.
When I was in kindergarten, I thought I could do anything. I thought I could be a painter, a firefighter, and astronaut. In high school, our focus became limited. They told us that we had to get into college first, to put our dreams on hold to focus on the path. In college, the vision became even narrower. I couldn't be a global health leader until I became a doctor and could be a doctor until I got into medical school, and couldn't get into medical school until I took the MCATs and couldn't take the MCATs until I took my premed requirements... and the list goes on and on. So much of my mental energy was spent on proving to others that I COULD do it.
A strange reversal occurred when I came to business school. Suddenly, everyone again had such lofty, idealistic goals. I have a friend who wants to be president of the US. Another wants to be president of Bolivia. One wants to own the most successful company in the world. Many want to be the best parent on earth. We can do anything. Harvard Business School, like kindergarten, fosters an environment where I should not just dream big, I should truly believe realistically that can become Director of the World Health Organization, if I wanted to be.
What happened between age 5 and 25 where our teachers and friends thought that encouragement is overrated?
I spoke to an premed student today who wants to start a non-profit organization, akin to Doctors Without Borders. People told her that she was being unrealistic. It made me incredibly sad. There's nothing in her life or in her career path that is preventing her from accomplishing that mission. Why discourage her? It's so easy to thwart other people's hopes and dreams. I bet a lot of people told Paul Farmer that he couldn't improve health care in Haiti. If Barack listened to everyone who said "America isn't ready for a black president," he would be here today. I wonder how many people told Sandra Day O'Connor that it's unlikely that she'd be the first female Supreme Court Justice.
It's a sad testament to our peer groups. We were reminded in class last week that we should surround ourselves by people who will make us better. I hope this premed girl who I spoke to on the phone ignores the words of discouragement from others, and ends up with the most effective non-profit in the world.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Bribes
So, my previous blog noted that I bribed my building manager to get a parking pass. I contemplated the ethics of my bribe.
The update is that the manager got removed from his position. Should I return my parking permit?
>Wow, my life must be good if this is the biggest stress I have for the day<
The update is that the manager got removed from his position. Should I return my parking permit?
>Wow, my life must be good if this is the biggest stress I have for the day<
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Department of Health
The Department of Health sometimes seems to be more of a departure from health than the Department of Health.
When the earthquake hit this week (5.4), the building vacillated back and forth like leaves in a gust of wind. Being on the 9th floor, my blinds started clapping and I felt, for a moment, that I was in the ocean, swaying back and forth. The elevators shut off and the building vomited people out the emergency exits. Unfortunately, many people here decided that they were too unhealthy, or just didn't want to take the stairs.
As an unhealthy eater myself, and a self-aware hypocrite, it still gives me pause to know that the average individual at the Department of Health is obese. Yesterday, like many days our of the week, we had celebration cake and candy was abundant. While we are cognizant of our un-health and the impact on public health, we continue to ignore the consequences. Ironically, we will still work hard everyday to solve the county's health care needs.
When the earthquake hit this week (5.4), the building vacillated back and forth like leaves in a gust of wind. Being on the 9th floor, my blinds started clapping and I felt, for a moment, that I was in the ocean, swaying back and forth. The elevators shut off and the building vomited people out the emergency exits. Unfortunately, many people here decided that they were too unhealthy, or just didn't want to take the stairs.
As an unhealthy eater myself, and a self-aware hypocrite, it still gives me pause to know that the average individual at the Department of Health is obese. Yesterday, like many days our of the week, we had celebration cake and candy was abundant. While we are cognizant of our un-health and the impact on public health, we continue to ignore the consequences. Ironically, we will still work hard everyday to solve the county's health care needs.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Rings
I liked what he said yesterday:
"Girls should never have to hint at the type of engagement rings. A girl should love whatever ring her boyfriend gives her. And he should know to buy exactly she would love."
"Girls should never have to hint at the type of engagement rings. A girl should love whatever ring her boyfriend gives her. And he should know to buy exactly she would love."
The Bachelorette
I must have been bored out of my mind yesterday. I watched an episode of The Bachelorette last night. They are surprisingly making most people seem really normal. She's a "great" bachelorette and is doing an "amazing" job. Anyways, if I might decide to comment on it... maybe not....
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Bribes
In our classes in business school, we talked about the ethics of bribes. Of course, the general consensus is that bribes are bad, ethics are good. If only the real word was so easy.
Take the situation that emerged today:
I've been living with my boyfriend for the past month. Parking in downtown Los Angeles is horrendous. We have 2 cars and 1 parking spot. For the first few weeks, we snuck my car past the security guards, but that plan didn't succeed for long. After they kicked us out, my boyfriend left my car at his work about 5 miles away, which amounted to getting warning tickets.
Parking in the unguarded lot across the street is $120/mo. Parking in his building is $150/mo. I was happily ready and willing to pay the $300 today for the last 2 months of the summer. When I walked into the manager's office, he explained to me that there was a 2 year wait period for an extra spot and that there was no way that I would be able to get a parking pass, as it was full.
After little negotiation, he said that he'd borrow a pass for me (as long as I didn't tell anyone) and give it to me for $150 for the rest of the summer. He gets a nice bonus for the day; I get my parking pass.
Ethical? Probably not. Bribe? Yes.
Do I feel bad about it? Just marginally as I'm writing this blog, but not really. I wonder what other people would do in this situation?
Take the situation that emerged today:
I've been living with my boyfriend for the past month. Parking in downtown Los Angeles is horrendous. We have 2 cars and 1 parking spot. For the first few weeks, we snuck my car past the security guards, but that plan didn't succeed for long. After they kicked us out, my boyfriend left my car at his work about 5 miles away, which amounted to getting warning tickets.
Parking in the unguarded lot across the street is $120/mo. Parking in his building is $150/mo. I was happily ready and willing to pay the $300 today for the last 2 months of the summer. When I walked into the manager's office, he explained to me that there was a 2 year wait period for an extra spot and that there was no way that I would be able to get a parking pass, as it was full.
After little negotiation, he said that he'd borrow a pass for me (as long as I didn't tell anyone) and give it to me for $150 for the rest of the summer. He gets a nice bonus for the day; I get my parking pass.
Ethical? Probably not. Bribe? Yes.
Do I feel bad about it? Just marginally as I'm writing this blog, but not really. I wonder what other people would do in this situation?
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Eyes Bloodshot, Doctors Vent Their Discontent
This article in the NYTimes is exactly what I was talking about during my last blog.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/17/health/views/17essa.html?em&ex=1213848000&en=90a2270d408d195d&ei=5087%0A
It is so sad to live with someone who loves surgery so much but has been so beaten down by medicine he can't go back.
I'm scared for when I go to residency.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/17/health/views/17essa.html?em&ex=1213848000&en=90a2270d408d195d&ei=5087%0A
It is so sad to live with someone who loves surgery so much but has been so beaten down by medicine he can't go back.
I'm scared for when I go to residency.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Doctor for hire
There are certain professional titles are permanent. Once a Senator, always a Senator. President Clinton will always be addressed by "President". My boss hasn't practiced medicine in a decade and he's still "Dr. So-and-so". Once a doctor, always a doctor. Once you get that MD, it changes your identity. People refer to our kind like they do ethnicity or other identifiers. "Oh he's Hispanic." "She's old." "She's a doctor." Very few people ever say "He used to be a doctor" like they would say "He used to be a secretary." Even if he moves onto picking up trash for a living, he will always be referred to as a doctor. The title supersedes other positions.
What about all of these residents who are quitting now? My cousin quit ophthalmology. My boyfriend quit surgery. I have a friend who quit emergency medicine last month, one who quit internal medicine, another who quit OB/Gyn.
What is interesting about the situation is that the medical system hasn't adapted to the increasing number of fallen soldiers. The other interesting piece is the conversations that are had.
Between residents:
"I quit residency"
"Congrats. It sucks here, I totally understand."
Between a resident and non:
"I quit residency."
"Why? After all that you've done, how? Can you go back? Are you sure? (more questions)"
The truth is that residency sucks for most people. I consistently have friends that say "Intern year was the worst year of my life." And then they quit.
So now what? Like the rest of the US, they are looking for jobs. So I write this blog to urge companies, to look at the growing market of jobless doctors. They are hard working, intelligent, introspective, and brave. Above all, they were just working 80-90 hrs per week, 6-days a week. for $40K. Give them a job that is 60 hrs/wk and weekends off and you'll get the hardest working individual at your company.
Need a referral? I know a dozen highly qualified, completely abused former residents for hire.
What about all of these residents who are quitting now? My cousin quit ophthalmology. My boyfriend quit surgery. I have a friend who quit emergency medicine last month, one who quit internal medicine, another who quit OB/Gyn.
What is interesting about the situation is that the medical system hasn't adapted to the increasing number of fallen soldiers. The other interesting piece is the conversations that are had.
Between residents:
"I quit residency"
"Congrats. It sucks here, I totally understand."
Between a resident and non:
"I quit residency."
"Why? After all that you've done, how? Can you go back? Are you sure? (more questions)"
The truth is that residency sucks for most people. I consistently have friends that say "Intern year was the worst year of my life." And then they quit.
So now what? Like the rest of the US, they are looking for jobs. So I write this blog to urge companies, to look at the growing market of jobless doctors. They are hard working, intelligent, introspective, and brave. Above all, they were just working 80-90 hrs per week, 6-days a week. for $40K. Give them a job that is 60 hrs/wk and weekends off and you'll get the hardest working individual at your company.
Need a referral? I know a dozen highly qualified, completely abused former residents for hire.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Unhappy
Everyone is so unhappy today. This is quite a bad omen.
The past week has been filled with sorrow. My mother called me this morning crying. My boyfriend called this morning on the way to work after he yelled at a parking attendant. I am hoping my boss doesn't yell at me for blogging at work.
>10 minutes later<
Good thing my boss didn't yell at me. But he looks sad too. Maybe it will just be a bad day for everyone and I should make cookies to make people feel better.
The past week has been filled with sorrow. My mother called me this morning crying. My boyfriend called this morning on the way to work after he yelled at a parking attendant. I am hoping my boss doesn't yell at me for blogging at work.
>10 minutes later<
Good thing my boss didn't yell at me. But he looks sad too. Maybe it will just be a bad day for everyone and I should make cookies to make people feel better.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Laughing
The sound of "I love you so much" woke me up today.
As he stood by the windowsill last night, he watch me sleep from across the room. Like a child with a new toy, happiness filled him and caused him to laugh out loud.
After months of waiting and anticipation, the move into his studio this week was better than I could have imagined. We study side-by-side with at least a small bit of contact, even if it our feet intertwined. A kiss every 5-minutes is the rule, with allowances for breaking the rule, if, and only if, it expedites the 5-minute rule.
This is my new home. It has been 10 years since I have called any location "home". As a self-proclaimed nomad, love broke the path of wandering the earth.
Life has never been better.
As he stood by the windowsill last night, he watch me sleep from across the room. Like a child with a new toy, happiness filled him and caused him to laugh out loud.
After months of waiting and anticipation, the move into his studio this week was better than I could have imagined. We study side-by-side with at least a small bit of contact, even if it our feet intertwined. A kiss every 5-minutes is the rule, with allowances for breaking the rule, if, and only if, it expedites the 5-minute rule.
This is my new home. It has been 10 years since I have called any location "home". As a self-proclaimed nomad, love broke the path of wandering the earth.
Life has never been better.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Residency
This is a work in action.
You know you are a resident when:
1. You will sit through a boring hour-long presentation for free food that would have cost $6 in the cafeteria.
2. You have a refrigerator full of Gatorade and water bottles from the hospital (because you had extra money on your meal card).
3. A 60-hour work week sounds like a vacation.
4. You think about sleeping at in your car at red lights post-call.
5. You jump at the sound of crickets, construction sites, large cars backing up, or anything else that resembles the sound of a pager.
6. You refer to Saturday and Sunday off as a "Golden Weekend," something so rare, that it is almost priceless.
7. You scoff at references to Grey's Anatomy and sex in call-rooms.
8. You lie about going to go take a dump, and instead, read about your patient's diseases or your next surgery.
9. You have watched 4th of July or/and New Year's fireworks from the roof of the hospital.
10. You were on "jeopardy" and it was not a game show.
11. Your patients, in all seriousness ask you, "You look so young, have you done this before?"
12. You say "was" instead of an thing in the present tense when referring to being idealistic.
13. You are able, and happy to take 10 minute naps.
14. Quitting crosses your mind weekly or daily, if not hourly.
To be continued...
You know you are a resident when:
1. You will sit through a boring hour-long presentation for free food that would have cost $6 in the cafeteria.
2. You have a refrigerator full of Gatorade and water bottles from the hospital (because you had extra money on your meal card).
3. A 60-hour work week sounds like a vacation.
4. You think about sleeping at in your car at red lights post-call.
5. You jump at the sound of crickets, construction sites, large cars backing up, or anything else that resembles the sound of a pager.
6. You refer to Saturday and Sunday off as a "Golden Weekend," something so rare, that it is almost priceless.
7. You scoff at references to Grey's Anatomy and sex in call-rooms.
8. You lie about going to go take a dump, and instead, read about your patient's diseases or your next surgery.
9. You have watched 4th of July or/and New Year's fireworks from the roof of the hospital.
10. You were on "jeopardy" and it was not a game show.
11. Your patients, in all seriousness ask you, "You look so young, have you done this before?"
12. You say "was" instead of an thing in the present tense when referring to being idealistic.
13. You are able, and happy to take 10 minute naps.
14. Quitting crosses your mind weekly or daily, if not hourly.
To be continued...
Business School
You know you are in business school when:
1. You feel guilty for not going out, even though you went out the last 32 nights in a row.
2. You turn down an all you can eat, all you can drink dinner because you have to listen to a company presentation for 10 minutes.
3. You have an alcohol budget.
4. You get mad when other people don't know how to use excel.
5. You expect to get at least 3 days a week off.
6. A long day is when you have have class from 8:40-2:30, with 1 hour and 50 minutes of break time in between.
7. You have taken or would take a weekend trip for $2000.
8. You know where at least 100 classmates have worked, went to school, and their marital status.
To be continued
1. You feel guilty for not going out, even though you went out the last 32 nights in a row.
2. You turn down an all you can eat, all you can drink dinner because you have to listen to a company presentation for 10 minutes.
3. You have an alcohol budget.
4. You get mad when other people don't know how to use excel.
5. You expect to get at least 3 days a week off.
6. A long day is when you have have class from 8:40-2:30, with 1 hour and 50 minutes of break time in between.
7. You have taken or would take a weekend trip for $2000.
8. You know where at least 100 classmates have worked, went to school, and their marital status.
To be continued
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Un-Stress
Studying is something professional students neither loathe nor cherish. For the past 10 years, taking tests have become a routine occurrence, like allergies during the spring or taxes in April. They are not really fun, but progressively less stressful than in high school.
Last week, however, was the pinnacle of test un-stress.
My professors said to us that they have done a significant number of studies about how success correlates with grades at HBS. Each result has shown that they are not correlated. That's the greatest news of the week. When a professor says "Grades don't matter in any of your classes," stress significantly decreases. It's even better when he says it right before the final exam.
Life is good.
Last week, however, was the pinnacle of test un-stress.
My professors said to us that they have done a significant number of studies about how success correlates with grades at HBS. Each result has shown that they are not correlated. That's the greatest news of the week. When a professor says "Grades don't matter in any of your classes," stress significantly decreases. It's even better when he says it right before the final exam.
Life is good.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Fell in Love
That's it. I fell in love.
When I started this blog, I had so much running through my mind, but everything that I wanted to articulate has been said in a song, picture, or movie of some sort. "He" always says that I'm the writer of the two us, but romantic lines roll off of his tongue like a native language.
So, that's it. After 2 dating shows, 10 years of searching, and 50 first and last dates, I'm done. I just met him 3 weeks ago, but we both decided. Either this is the biggest mistake of our lives, or we are the luckiest two people in the world. I think the latter.
How do I know? I just do. We know.
And the fun begins....
When I started this blog, I had so much running through my mind, but everything that I wanted to articulate has been said in a song, picture, or movie of some sort. "He" always says that I'm the writer of the two us, but romantic lines roll off of his tongue like a native language.
So, that's it. After 2 dating shows, 10 years of searching, and 50 first and last dates, I'm done. I just met him 3 weeks ago, but we both decided. Either this is the biggest mistake of our lives, or we are the luckiest two people in the world. I think the latter.
How do I know? I just do. We know.
And the fun begins....
Friday, February 1, 2008
Insecure
Dear Harvard,
Before coming to Harvard, I was relatively secure in who I was, what I wanted to do, my intelligence, and ability to fend for myself. Everything always works out, somehow. Attending Harvard Business School was supposed to enhance those notions and add more reassurance.
In the beginning, they told us that we are going to get basically whatever job we wanted. We are the best and the brightest. They thanked us for coming here. We were going to make a difference in the world, make it a better place, or at least make a lot of money. The perception was that once we came to Harvard Business School, jobs and money were going to be thrown at us.
And then classes began. Cold calls made us feel were cold and stupid. The financially retarded (myself) were lost in discussions about the intricacies of the Capital Asset Pricing Model when all I wanted was for someone to sit me down and tell me that banks did more than keep our money in a vault. To make it worse, I was even an inadequate bar hopper. I couldn't even be good at drinking anymore.
I attended a workshop by career services a few months ago and me and my team members concluded at the end of the 8 hour day of personal exploration that:
1. We don't know what the hell we want to do in 10 years.
2. It doesn't matter that much because things work out.
3. We are the shit, regardless of our summer internship (or lack thereof).
One song line sums up my experience with Harvard thus far, "Why do you build me up (build me up) Buttercup, baby Just to let me down (let me down) and mess me around?"
So, I write to you, Harvard Business School, to tell you in the words of Stuart Smalley, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me."
Regards,
Tina Wu
HBS Class of 2009
Before coming to Harvard, I was relatively secure in who I was, what I wanted to do, my intelligence, and ability to fend for myself. Everything always works out, somehow. Attending Harvard Business School was supposed to enhance those notions and add more reassurance.
In the beginning, they told us that we are going to get basically whatever job we wanted. We are the best and the brightest. They thanked us for coming here. We were going to make a difference in the world, make it a better place, or at least make a lot of money. The perception was that once we came to Harvard Business School, jobs and money were going to be thrown at us.
And then classes began. Cold calls made us feel were cold and stupid. The financially retarded (myself) were lost in discussions about the intricacies of the Capital Asset Pricing Model when all I wanted was for someone to sit me down and tell me that banks did more than keep our money in a vault. To make it worse, I was even an inadequate bar hopper. I couldn't even be good at drinking anymore.
I attended a workshop by career services a few months ago and me and my team members concluded at the end of the 8 hour day of personal exploration that:
1. We don't know what the hell we want to do in 10 years.
2. It doesn't matter that much because things work out.
3. We are the shit, regardless of our summer internship (or lack thereof).
One song line sums up my experience with Harvard thus far, "Why do you build me up (build me up) Buttercup, baby Just to let me down (let me down) and mess me around?"
So, I write to you, Harvard Business School, to tell you in the words of Stuart Smalley, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me."
Regards,
Tina Wu
HBS Class of 2009
Monday, January 21, 2008
Unbearable
To all those who continue to say to me, "It's the wind that makes it cold here."
It's not the wind that makes it cold. It's the cold that makes it cold, dammit! It's the wind that makes it unbearable.
(btw, this weekend the forecast said that with wind chill it was 9 degrees. Without wind, it's still 20 degrees.)
It's not the wind that makes it cold. It's the cold that makes it cold, dammit! It's the wind that makes it unbearable.
(btw, this weekend the forecast said that with wind chill it was 9 degrees. Without wind, it's still 20 degrees.)
Thursday, January 3, 2008
How Sad.
How sad.
He couldn’t hold in the tears, although it was obvious that he was trying. As a small gesture, the airport security allowed his family to walk to the absolute closest point where they could see him walk away, without breaking laws.
Dressed in his uniform, he looked older than his lack of wrinkles alluded. The uniform couldn’t hide his parents’ and sister’s dark circles and red eyes. Even with the tears, the goodbye, you could tell was not their first, and hopefully not their last. There was an expertise in their departure with deep breaths that inhaled familiar air.
It was a sad reminder of the importance of the upcoming election and the gravity of our vote. Are they putting themselves in harm’s way for our country? Are they fighting for our president? Or are they simply political ammunition?
I avoided anti-war rallies in order to support the troops. And now I would love to go to any sort of rally, for or against. The worst part of the situation is our current ambivalence. Not only have we forgotten about the war, we have forgotten about our soldiers who are representing our freedom and democracy.
We simply do not care anymore. How sad.
He couldn’t hold in the tears, although it was obvious that he was trying. As a small gesture, the airport security allowed his family to walk to the absolute closest point where they could see him walk away, without breaking laws.
Dressed in his uniform, he looked older than his lack of wrinkles alluded. The uniform couldn’t hide his parents’ and sister’s dark circles and red eyes. Even with the tears, the goodbye, you could tell was not their first, and hopefully not their last. There was an expertise in their departure with deep breaths that inhaled familiar air.
It was a sad reminder of the importance of the upcoming election and the gravity of our vote. Are they putting themselves in harm’s way for our country? Are they fighting for our president? Or are they simply political ammunition?
I avoided anti-war rallies in order to support the troops. And now I would love to go to any sort of rally, for or against. The worst part of the situation is our current ambivalence. Not only have we forgotten about the war, we have forgotten about our soldiers who are representing our freedom and democracy.
We simply do not care anymore. How sad.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
Resolutions
My list of resolutions differs this year. Usually, it centers around exercising, sleeping, and studying. This year, business school has changed that.
1. Study less, sleep more. For the most part, 4/5 of my grades at HBS surprised me. A couple of them shocked me, in both negative and positive ways. But all indicated that I should study less.
2. Be more high maintenance. You would think I'm kidding, but no, I'm serious. I should get pedicures sometimes, a massage, buy a new purse. I might fall back to my old ways though.
3. As opposed to the average medical student, my goal is to go out less -not more- less. The number of hours spent drinking in 2007 greatly scarred my Arizona Wildcat trained liver.
4. In addition to going out and drinking less, I need to try to recoup some of the brain cells I lost since coming to HBS. I would like to read more. Increased schooling has caused me to become progressively more and more retarded.
5. Speak less, listen more. HBS has drilled into my head the need to participate unnecessarily in class. From now on, when I have nothing useful to contribute, I'll try not to, even though worthless comments are highly regarded here.
6. Throw more parties. I know this seems counter to Resolution #3, but that's okay, I figure if I do 1/2 that ain't bad.
1. Study less, sleep more. For the most part, 4/5 of my grades at HBS surprised me. A couple of them shocked me, in both negative and positive ways. But all indicated that I should study less.
2. Be more high maintenance. You would think I'm kidding, but no, I'm serious. I should get pedicures sometimes, a massage, buy a new purse. I might fall back to my old ways though.
3. As opposed to the average medical student, my goal is to go out less -not more- less. The number of hours spent drinking in 2007 greatly scarred my Arizona Wildcat trained liver.
4. In addition to going out and drinking less, I need to try to recoup some of the brain cells I lost since coming to HBS. I would like to read more. Increased schooling has caused me to become progressively more and more retarded.
5. Speak less, listen more. HBS has drilled into my head the need to participate unnecessarily in class. From now on, when I have nothing useful to contribute, I'll try not to, even though worthless comments are highly regarded here.
6. Throw more parties. I know this seems counter to Resolution #3, but that's okay, I figure if I do 1/2 that ain't bad.
Friday, December 28, 2007
It's not her fault
It’s not her fault.
It’s not her fault she is growing up privileged. None of her siblings have passed away from any congenital abnormalities. She didn’t live through September 11th, or any other terrorist attack, for that matter. All of her organs are intact and she has no desire to give one away. She has all 5 senses, but no more than that. Her abnormality is that at the age of 14, her mother already wants her to go Harvard for college.
My mother asked me to go talk to her a few weeks ago. Actually, her mother asked my mom to ask me to talk to her. When I spoke to her, she asked me what to do. She took out a notepad to scribe my words of wisdom.
My advice?
“Say no to drugs.”
“Wear a seatbelt.”
“Don’t drink too much. You only have 1 liver.”
What the hell was I supposed to say to this 14-year-old? I’m not Confucius, the Dali Lama, or a fortune cookie. The reality is that Barack Obama has done drugs. I don't wear my seatbelt all the time. Most Harvard Business School students drink. Sometimes we drink a lot. Sometimes people even puke and black out after they drink. But we are still at Harvard.
The reality is that she’s a 14-year-old who just likes to read. Her parents are healthy, rich, and overprotective. She will attend math camps, become a pretty good pianist, and read hundreds of books. She’ll score in the 98% on her SATs, get straight A’s, volunteer at a hospital, and will not have a criminal record. The reality is that she’ll have nothing “interesting” to say on her personal statement. Her letters of recommendation will say that she’s a smart girl who works hard. And the admissions committees will see that she is like almost every other Chinese-American kid on both coasts.
My dad was diagnosed with cancer when I was 3 and he died when I was 6. My mom bought our meals with food stamps. I used to be afraid of the dark because cockroaches came out in gangs at night in my house. I had asthma because my father smoked himself to death. And I used to write about some of these problems in my personal statements and talk about them in my interviews. It made me different. Yet, I hated my childhood and adolescence. This also doesn't make me a more qualified applicant.
Sometimes what happens in life is not under your control. People experiences are, in very simplified terms, one of the following:
1. You were raised privileged, stayed that way, and made the most out of it
2. You were raised privileged, stayed that way, and still screwed up.
3. You were not privileged and/or had a life crisis, but were able to make more out of it.
4. You were not privileged and/or had a life crisis and could not recover.
(There are many exceptions like kjillionaires because you can buy your way into most schools). Admissions committees love #3. Even if #1 has better grades, more polished, better essays, and is more educated, #3 is sometimes more interesting and an easier sell. #1 didn’t do anything wrong but just got dealt good life cards.
My advice to the 14 year old should be:
“Cut off your left hand with a hacksaw while trying to build a crib for orphans in Guatemala. Then learn how to type and become a concert pianist with your prosthetic.”
“Give 40 pints of blood in high school to represent the 40 million people slowly bleeding to death without health insurance.”
“Try to be the youngest person to swallow 14 calculators, whole.”
“Learn how to speak 17 languages you will never use.”
“Sleep with whomever it takes to get Bill Gates, Bill Clinton, or Bill Nye The Science Guy write you a glowing 4 page letter or recommendation.”
If you are a parent who believes that Harvard is the only school that provides an acceptable education, beware, the chance that your child will drop out of school completely, have an illegitimate child as a teen, or overdose on a legal or illegal drug is significantly higher.
Think idealistically, but live realistically. Love your children for who they are and stop trying to live vicariously through them.
It’s not her fault she is growing up privileged. None of her siblings have passed away from any congenital abnormalities. She didn’t live through September 11th, or any other terrorist attack, for that matter. All of her organs are intact and she has no desire to give one away. She has all 5 senses, but no more than that. Her abnormality is that at the age of 14, her mother already wants her to go Harvard for college.
My mother asked me to go talk to her a few weeks ago. Actually, her mother asked my mom to ask me to talk to her. When I spoke to her, she asked me what to do. She took out a notepad to scribe my words of wisdom.
My advice?
“Say no to drugs.”
“Wear a seatbelt.”
“Don’t drink too much. You only have 1 liver.”
What the hell was I supposed to say to this 14-year-old? I’m not Confucius, the Dali Lama, or a fortune cookie. The reality is that Barack Obama has done drugs. I don't wear my seatbelt all the time. Most Harvard Business School students drink. Sometimes we drink a lot. Sometimes people even puke and black out after they drink. But we are still at Harvard.
The reality is that she’s a 14-year-old who just likes to read. Her parents are healthy, rich, and overprotective. She will attend math camps, become a pretty good pianist, and read hundreds of books. She’ll score in the 98% on her SATs, get straight A’s, volunteer at a hospital, and will not have a criminal record. The reality is that she’ll have nothing “interesting” to say on her personal statement. Her letters of recommendation will say that she’s a smart girl who works hard. And the admissions committees will see that she is like almost every other Chinese-American kid on both coasts.
My dad was diagnosed with cancer when I was 3 and he died when I was 6. My mom bought our meals with food stamps. I used to be afraid of the dark because cockroaches came out in gangs at night in my house. I had asthma because my father smoked himself to death. And I used to write about some of these problems in my personal statements and talk about them in my interviews. It made me different. Yet, I hated my childhood and adolescence. This also doesn't make me a more qualified applicant.
Sometimes what happens in life is not under your control. People experiences are, in very simplified terms, one of the following:
1. You were raised privileged, stayed that way, and made the most out of it
2. You were raised privileged, stayed that way, and still screwed up.
3. You were not privileged and/or had a life crisis, but were able to make more out of it.
4. You were not privileged and/or had a life crisis and could not recover.
(There are many exceptions like kjillionaires because you can buy your way into most schools). Admissions committees love #3. Even if #1 has better grades, more polished, better essays, and is more educated, #3 is sometimes more interesting and an easier sell. #1 didn’t do anything wrong but just got dealt good life cards.
My advice to the 14 year old should be:
“Cut off your left hand with a hacksaw while trying to build a crib for orphans in Guatemala. Then learn how to type and become a concert pianist with your prosthetic.”
“Give 40 pints of blood in high school to represent the 40 million people slowly bleeding to death without health insurance.”
“Try to be the youngest person to swallow 14 calculators, whole.”
“Learn how to speak 17 languages you will never use.”
“Sleep with whomever it takes to get Bill Gates, Bill Clinton, or Bill Nye The Science Guy write you a glowing 4 page letter or recommendation.”
If you are a parent who believes that Harvard is the only school that provides an acceptable education, beware, the chance that your child will drop out of school completely, have an illegitimate child as a teen, or overdose on a legal or illegal drug is significantly higher.
Think idealistically, but live realistically. Love your children for who they are and stop trying to live vicariously through them.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Winter
As I peer outside of my window, it's hard to see how fast the wind is blowing. This campus is so pristine that there is no trash to kick, no papers to blow around. The leaves have been swept away and the grass, if it were alive, is covered in snow. The skeletons of the trees and shrubs vacillate, but the trunks are so anchored with the support of the snow that the slight teetering is deceiving.
Moments in Medicine
I promised myself that I would relegate myself to a coffee shop and just think and write.
Moments in medicine.
When I go back to medicine, I want to remember why I went into medicine. And for those who are reading this blog, write your moments, lest you may forget them and get overwhelmed in
- searching for word that encompasses bitterness, long work hours, exhaustion, family pressures, trying to believe you like something you don't, financial insecurity, ungrateful patients, angry attendings - medicine.
Every time I want to quit, I will read this entry to remember.
Heather- thank you for giving up your kidney to an unrelated child. You gave your kidney selflessly and I will forever remember your smiling face going to the OR. Thank you for letting me start your IV that morning.
Dr. DeVirgilio- When I cried in your office, you comforted me and did not kick me out. In retrospect, I would have kicked myself out. Thank you for taking care of Teresa T. You took her to the OR at least 10 times while I was on your service and tried to save her leg because she would have rather died than amputate her leg. You tried tirelessly.
The surgeon who I took care of on my medicine rotation at Kaiser - you told me a story that made me cry. The story was of your mentor who performed 5 operations one night on the same child and would not give up until the surgery was perfect. I do not want to give up.
Ana M- I'm sorry we made a mistake during your pregnancy.
Emily- Life sucks. Your life has sucked. You are a beautiful young lady who keeps getting dealt a piss poor poker hand. You've been raped, molested, cheated, and abandoned. I'm sorry that I also had to abandon you, but my attending told me that if I came and visited after my rotation, you would be attached to me and it would be detrimental to your treatment.
Guardado- I'm sorry our healthcare system wouldn't give you hope. You are an illegal immigrant and therefore couldn't get a transplant. You couldn't even get on the list because you were not supposed to be working hard for your family in the US.
Natalie - you are a kick ass resident who taught me well.
Moments in medicine.
When I go back to medicine, I want to remember why I went into medicine. And for those who are reading this blog, write your moments, lest you may forget them and get overwhelmed in
- searching for word that encompasses bitterness, long work hours, exhaustion, family pressures, trying to believe you like something you don't, financial insecurity, ungrateful patients, angry attendings - medicine.
Every time I want to quit, I will read this entry to remember.
Heather- thank you for giving up your kidney to an unrelated child. You gave your kidney selflessly and I will forever remember your smiling face going to the OR. Thank you for letting me start your IV that morning.
Dr. DeVirgilio- When I cried in your office, you comforted me and did not kick me out. In retrospect, I would have kicked myself out. Thank you for taking care of Teresa T. You took her to the OR at least 10 times while I was on your service and tried to save her leg because she would have rather died than amputate her leg. You tried tirelessly.
The surgeon who I took care of on my medicine rotation at Kaiser - you told me a story that made me cry. The story was of your mentor who performed 5 operations one night on the same child and would not give up until the surgery was perfect. I do not want to give up.
Ana M- I'm sorry we made a mistake during your pregnancy.
Emily- Life sucks. Your life has sucked. You are a beautiful young lady who keeps getting dealt a piss poor poker hand. You've been raped, molested, cheated, and abandoned. I'm sorry that I also had to abandon you, but my attending told me that if I came and visited after my rotation, you would be attached to me and it would be detrimental to your treatment.
Guardado- I'm sorry our healthcare system wouldn't give you hope. You are an illegal immigrant and therefore couldn't get a transplant. You couldn't even get on the list because you were not supposed to be working hard for your family in the US.
Natalie - you are a kick ass resident who taught me well.
Kidney for Free
Bug me in 15 years. After I'm done having kids, I'd like to donate a kidney. Someone hold me to that.
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Undefeated
Section A Soccer Team: Undefeated and Intramural champions. We really are the best sports city in the world.
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